who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
