I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize
