He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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