It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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