it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Randomize