So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
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