next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
