I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Randomize
