i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
We talked him into tasing himself.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Come on in and take your pants off
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