wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize