I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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