nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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