You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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