I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Randomize
