You just made me feel so damn special
Need sex. Gaining weight.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
