i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
