Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Randomize
