when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
