So drunk, too bad you don't want this
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
