i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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