Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
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