Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
