thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Randomize
