even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
