i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
my shit smells like andre
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
