I bet he comes in French.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
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