I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
