It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
you will always have a special place in my vag
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
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