Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Randomize
