no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Randomize
