IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
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