btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
