yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Randomize
