Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
