He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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