Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
