Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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