Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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