"it" just moved
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Randomize
