Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
