ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
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