so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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