the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
