how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
