do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
The beer is more important than you right now.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
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