...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
All the doctor said was why
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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