So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
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