their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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