Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
