We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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